Sunday, August 10, 2008

Torture


There is a space of approximately 10-15 inches between the speakers at Priya's. Absurd fact?
Sure, noticed during an absurd movie. I watched the curiously much-awaited movie "Singh is Kinng" (why, why the extra n?) and boy, do i regret it! Five minutes into the movie and i knew that i had paid a whopping(with respect to the movie) 85 bucks for this piece of shit. the movie is loud and noisy(My phone which was constantly buzzing throughout the 2.5 hour drag duration of the movie wasn't once audible to those sitting next to me). It provides for a great game of treasure hunt, as you will forever be looking for the story and later wondering what the story was. Seriously, you will be left speechless if you are asked to narrate the story of the movie!


In this supposed comedy, there is hardly anything that will set you roaring with laughter. Expect 3-4 chuckles and that too at the silliness of the humour, nothing more.
As for the actors, as per principle, Katrina Kaif has and will never do a film which is even a little intellectually appealing. She smiles and smiles and er..smiles till your jaws ache. One can actually count the number of dialogues(delivered in her accent that is anything but British. makes you wonder if she spent her whole life under Salman Khan's influence) she had in the movie--hardly 10 and none exceeding a word limit of 15(prefixed,suffixed with a smile, of course). Akshay Kumar is predictable but good. The editing just helps the non existing storyline in making the movie more unbearable.
Do not-
-Watch the movie even if you are not paying. It could be a conspiracy against you.
-Watch if you belong to the law fraternity or respect it, Katrina Kaif is apparently is studying law and is writing a book on how to "finish off" criminals. It will make u cringe and want to kick her ass and drill some sense into that tiny head of hers.
-watch it for the music. the snoop dog song is saved for the credits and isn't worth all the torture. -use your brains or try to figure out things. look what it's done to me.

Do wonder- -
-how this movie is breaking all the records.
-how the Hindu gave it a good review.
-why it hasn't found a place among the worst movies ever for being a movie made without a story or script.
( Seemingly made to provide employment for the support cast.)

If Time magazine makes a list of ten movies that did not deserve success or acclaim, Singh is Kinng will rule the list.
P.S- i am not a blindly hindi movie hating and english movie loving person. I have enjoyed more hindi movies than engish!

1 comment:

"My macrocosm" said...

I definitely agree with you...The movie was big-time crap... And especially the video of that song-Bhutni ke...When I had heard that song I thought allright...trying to be naughty..but...kk...kul! Bt d video was sch a diaster...Where on earth do such marriages happen in Punjabis??I am a Punjabi and God save that bridegroom getting exceptionally married!